Deep thoughts

Just one more day to go until I'm back at Victoria University for my final year of a Bachelor of Science degree. How am I feeling? A mixture of emotions really-excited because this is the final year of my degree and I feel like I've come so far. I'm also nervous because I'm not sure what this year will hold in store for me. After this year I will no longer be an undergraduate student. Then I will do a year of post graduate honours study. And then more post graduate study at teachers college. And then it will be time to go out into the world.

I think university is like a great transition in life- between childhood and adulthood.
My friend and I were talking the other day about how when we went to school we had a place. Everyone knew who you were. You had a reputation, and expectations, and you felt you had a place in the world. One of the greatest things I wondered when I graduated from high school was 'will we be remembered?' Will you be able to come back some years later and still be remembered? As experience shows- you are! And that is really awesome.

When you move on to university your status changes. You become a single drop in a never ending ocean. It's just you, yourself and you. You study because there is something you want to achieve, whether its a BSc(hons) or a BA or BCA degree. You are now both the teacher and the pupil. It is up to you to motivate and encourage yourself in order to achieve the very best. (I ask myself why we need to go to teachers college? We have plenty of teaching practice teaching ourselves while completing our degrees!!! :) )
And at times, although you love your university studies (and teaching!) to bits, there is a part of you that longs to go back to school. Hence you come back, making frequent visits.

You graduate from university, and then you must go out into the world and find yourself a place once more, now as an adult.

For me that time will come in 3 years time. When I finish university in 2 years time, and then teachers college, I wonder how I'll feel then. Will I miss University as much as I miss school? I read once that when you miss a place it is really because you miss the people that were there, and not the actual place itself...

...Ok enough philosophy lessons for one day! Will go and get ready to go back to University tomorrow! :)

Birthday Preparations

Just finished making my birthday invitations!
I know that some of my friends are too far away to make it to my birthday but I want you to know that I am still thinking of you, and if you were here in Wellington now, you would be at my birthday.

Finally Enrolled!!!

Today Tanya and I went in to Victoria University for 'enrollment in person' day. After showing Tanya around the campus (she starts university this year) and spending several hours running around Kelburn campus chasing lecturers and getting forms signed off (I never realised enrollment in person can be so complicated! You need to do a whole bunch of stuff, just to get your courses accepted! I've never enrolled in person before!) I finally managed to finalize my enrollment for 2008.

So now I'm officially enrolled for my final year of my BSc degree!!!
After many months of absolute torture choosing and re-choosing subjects, getting courses rejected and all these other complications the papers I'm taking in 2008 are ....
-Genetics, (BIOL341)
-Human molecular genetics, (BIOL342)
-Molecular biology lab #3, (BIOL361 - a 6 hour lab!)
-Molecular biology lab #4, (BIOL362- another 6 hour lab!... luckily they're in separate semesters! :) ... and I just got myself a new lab coat... that Dad is resizing because it's just too huge!!!)
-Evolution, (BIOL329- been waiting 2 years to take that paper!!!)
-English (200 level paper on Avant Garde- sounds interesting but have no idea what it's about!...oh well it will surely enhance my general knowledge!)
-Introduction to media culture (100 level-had to take that one, only way to get english as a teaching subject because all other relevant 100 level subjects didn't fit into my timetable, or I didn't like what they were about).

So yes this year I will be taking 7 papers, and it is indeed a very interesting combination! I will only have a couple of hours of lectures a week, but that means that I will be doing loads and loads and loads of independent study at home. I also got my course notes (for media) and lab book (for bio lab) so I can start reading up on those subjects.
Now that my timetable is sorted out I can start advertising for tutoring- making and hanging posters around schools and things like that, and hopefully I will get more students this year and enhance my amount of 'teaching experience'!Yeeehaaaaa!!!!!! Overall I'm quite pleased with the way everything worked out even though I didn't get to take marine biology. Now that my enrollment procedure is over for the year I think back to a couple of weeks ago and wonder why I was ever so worried! Everything worked out ok in the end :)

A sign to go up in my room...

せいぶつがく は たのしみ で ある

Heh heh heh :) I made a sign to go up in my room. Who can figure it out???

Evolutionary Wonders

1. Muliticellularity
2. Eye
3. Brain
4. Language
5. Photosynthesis
6. Death
7. Sex
8. Parasitism
9. Symbiosis
10. Super Organisms

Attitude

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.
Attitude to me is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than success, than what other people think or say or do.
It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.
It will make or break a company…a church…a home.
The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding our attitude we will embrace for that day.
We cannot change our past…we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.
We cannot change the inevitable.
The only thing we can do is play on the one thing we have, and that is
Our attitude.
I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me,
And 90% how I react to it. And so it is with everyone…
We are in charge of our attitudes.”

-Charles Swindoll

The Book that took a year to read...

I got the book 'A Short History of nearly Everything' by Bill Bryson last year for my birthday. And two days ago I finally finished reading it! I think it wins the record for the longest time I took to read a book! I spent almost a year reading it! (Between my studies and stuff. Then I lost my place when I was about half way through and told myself I had to start again!)
But it's just so fascinating! It's very good for gaining general knowledge of the world around you!

Like did you know that the Manson meteor crater in Arizona, at nearly a mile across and several hundred feet deep, is now the world's best known impact crater, but for much of the twentieth century it was thought to be the result of an explosion from within the Earth. In fact it was created by a meteor strike 50,000 years ago!

It is really awesome because it's all about the world of science! And the illustrations are amazing!

An artists depiction of the Periodic Table! I love it!This is one of my favourite illustrations! (from the astronomy section)

Wahh I hate it when a good book comes to an end!! Oh well, I've been reading it for long enough!
Now I have to finish my other two books that I'm reading- 'The origin of species' by Charles Darwin and 'Harry Potter and the half blood prince' in Russian...

Expressing Emotion: The Painting of 'Life'

Inspired to paint. I started this painting on the 8th of February 2008 titled 'Life' and completed it on the 13th February 2008 (today).
Expressing emotions in an artistic form.
-The road: Symbolises the journey of life that every individual undertakes. Every individual has their own path which they choose to follow. It is the path to enlightenment.
-The light: Our destination. Dreams, hopes, ambitions that we set off to conquor along our journey.
-The tree: The tree of life; how every individual grows like a tiny seed into a tree that blossoms, bringing beauty to the world.
-The flowers falling from the tree: Symbolise the things that each individual has to offer the world.
-The yellow background: Happiness. The world's greatest treasure is true happiness.
-The heart: Love for the things that you do in life.
-The mountains: Ambition and success. Each individual has their own mountaintop to which he must climb.
-The eagle: The freedom to soar high in the sky, follow your dreams and reach for the stars.
-The river and book: The river of knowledge and book of wisdom.
-The rainbow: Joy and fullfillment. Let the things that you do in life bring joy to you and the people around you.
-The cross: Whatever we choose to persue in life, what ever path we choose to follow, God will always be there for us and guide us along our way.
-The people linking hands: The value of friendship- true friendships that form throughout ones lifetime; friendships that lasts forever.
-The music notes: Laughter. We must never forget how to laugh-it is the music of the soul.
-The words 'Live'-'Love'-'Learn': 'Live' life to the full- you only live once. 'Love' everything that you choose to do in life-let everything you do in life come from the heart. 'Learn'- for as long as you live you will never stop learning.

It is a message for life.

Growing up...

Well I decided to get a haicut today. First I thought I'd grow it out until teachers college (so for the next two years) and then cut it short because when I start work I won't have time to fuss around with it in the mornings (and most teachers have short hair anyway). But now I decided that I should cut it now because this year my goal is to get as much teaching practice as possible so I'm hoping to get lots of students to tutor for english, science, bio or chem. And it would be a bit weird wearing pigtails/braids/ponytail while you're teaching because then I'll seem as young as my students! It's bad enough that I'm short and look about 15!
So Mum gave me a haircut. Hopefully now I look a bit older!

After that I met up with Liz and we went to Queensgate. We were going to plan my birthday but then we got sidetracked with other random stuff so we ended up just walking around Queensgate, where we kept bumping into teachers... like Linda's social studies teacher Mrs Guthard! By the way this year Linda has Sr Jo for maths, Mrs Hudson for science, Mrs Davie for english, Mr Kneale for art (he actually remembers me!!! :0 I didn't think he would!), Mrs Guthard for SOS and new teachers for RE, French, Graphics and PE. After having lunch we went over to my house and started watching Annie2 but then Liz had to go home so we decided to finish watching it next time.

Started writing my CV the other day. I was really surprised to find that I have quite a few experiences that are related to teaching! Like I have peer support training-theory and practical experience, tutoring, babysitting, exam supervision, holiday programme leader... But I really want to get more 'teaching ' experience this year! The more I have the better! Will do some advertising posters soon...

I'm also currently working on a painting titled 'life', but it's not yet complete because I keep on wanting to add more things in... will post it up when I finish! :)

Friends For Life

Standing by,
All the way.
Here to help you through your day.

Holding you up,
When you are weak,
Helping you find what it is you seek.

Catching your tears,
When you cry.
Pulling you through when the tide is high.

Just being there,
Through thick and thin,
All just to say, you are my friend.

- Brittani Kokko -

Back to school...!!! :):):)

Today was such an awesome day! Well, I was feeling depressed and schoolsick for the past few days... but today that changed...
This morning my friend Tanya came over to my house and then after lunch we went for a walk down to the centre of the Hutt. On the way we passed Sacred Heart College. Today I really wanted to go in and say "Hi". I felt terrible that I didn't last time. It was yr9 orientation day so it was all full of activity. When we got to the school around the side by E24 we saw everyone going into the hall for a briefing or something like that. So we decided to go to Queensgate and see Christina who was working at Muffin Break, and come back later. As it turned out by the time we got to Muffin Break Christina's shift was over and then we texted her she replied that she's at home!!

We then left Queensgate (after stayiong there only a very short time of about 20mins) and went back to school. It was 4pm and the yr9's were showing their parents around the school. After standing around by the side gate for a bit we went in to school. I was showing Tanya the classrooms E24 and E25 (it felt sooo great to be back!!! E24 and 25 are my favourite classrooms!!) and then just as we were walking past the deans office Mrs Burrell came out!!! Yeaaaaaaa!!! Haven't talked to her for over a year!! (soppy scene #1) We talked (no longer feel guilty about not going in to see her last time. I told her I was feeling schoolsick. I also said I had a year of my BSc to go and then a year of honours-hopefully, and then teaching! :)) and then me and Tanya continued making our way around the school (while Mrs Burrell had to go and help prepare for the yr9 concert). I showed Tanya all around Euphrasie building with all the science labs and maths classrooms. On the way I met Mrs Wootton my RE teacher (soppy scene #2) so we chatted for a bit too. Then I showed Tanya the library and I got to see Mrs Lawson the librarian!!! (soppy scene #3) Haven't talked to her since the end of 7th form! So we spent about half an hour in the library chatting! I told her my ambition is to come back to SHC and teach for ever and ever and ever... and rule the school! Hehehehe!!! Then I showed Tanya around the library (oh it was sooo nice to be back!!) and explained where everything was...aaahh I felt like I never left!

Then we went to the gym and around by the P block (with me giving her a detailed explanation about every classroom's significance) and then we went to Mission House. We stood around on the bottom floor looking at photos on the notice board when I noticed a familiar handbag at the bottom of the stairs. There was no mistaking it. Moments later Mrs Bartlett came down. Soppy scene #4 followed. So great to see her again and I finally got a chance to tell her that I'm taking some english papers at University so I could have english as another teaching subject! She was really happy about that! We talked a bit about teaching and then I had a chance to ask her about Kelly (the student I tutored) and Mrs Bartlett said she only passed one of her english papers. Sigh. I learnt that there is only so much a teacher can do. When Mrs Bartlett found out I tutored, she said that she would happily find me plenty of students for english and science subjects and then call me!!! Yeaaa!!! That would be absolutely wonderful!!! After saying bye to Mrs Bartlett I continued showing Tanya the classrooms up in Mission house.

Then I showed Tanya the rest of the classrooms, we went down to the carpark where we met walking towards us Ms Buist and Ms Prendergast! That was unexpected! Soppy scene #5 followed. After that Tanya and I went and sat on mine and Anita's traditional favourite seat, opposite the carpark. By this time it was already way past 5pm (I was soo late to Mum's dance classes... but hey, that's the advantage of having your Mum being the teacher) so we just sat there talking for a while, before heading to Mum's dance studio. When we arrived they were just finishing the lesson. Mum forgave me for not turning up after I told her what I've been doing. We took Tanya home and then went home ourselves.

In conclusion of this eventful day I feel soo happy right now!!!! So incredibly happy!!! :):):)

...don't cry...

I feel like I want to cry. Don’t know what has gotten into me today. This morning I woke up feeling fine. At 10am I met Melissa M near Sacred Heart College and then the two of us went for a walk. It was so nice to see her again! She had been in Malaysia for the past few months and now she’s back! We just walked and talked nonstop about the normal things that people talk about at the beginning of the year –starting classes, subjects, life in general. Felt so great! We didn’t even realize where we were walking! Supposedly we were walking back to my house but then we finally realized we were walking around the block, around Sacred Heart!

As we walked past the outside of E24 I saw Mrs Burrell and Mrs Dick through the window blinds, and the classroom and everything, and suddenly I felt really sad. It’s a horrible feeling. I mean, I haven’t been at school for 2 years now so supposedly I should not be feeling school sick right now… but I am. Grrr! I really should have gone in and said hi... will definately do next time... I felt terrible afterwards!

It felt so nice talking to Melissa and I realized just how much I missed having my close friends around. And that made me think of school again… Don’t get me wrong I love university to bits… but there are some things that are just missing…like having close friends around, and knowing everyone really well. At university you meet heaps of new people and stuff like that, but are they really your friends??? So far I’ve managed to make one friend who I actually consider a friend and not just an acquaintance. Sigh. It’s just so hard, with everyone doing their own thing and there’s just no time for meeting up and chatting, and getting to know people for who they really are.

When we returned to my house I received my offer of study, and found that I was rejected for 3 of my papers for this year! I felt so frustrated! I knew I didn’t have some of the required prerequisites but I put so much effort into writing my explanations for exception! I wrote them like debates, arguing my point of view. It’s so stupid. I only didn’t have one of the prerequisites for each paper…I really thought they’d let me take 200-level English and marine biology… sigh. It’s so stupid how lecturers don’t even know who we are. I mean, if they knew how we were really dedicated to our studies and willing to learn they would let us do papers we want and make exceptions. When we left school there were teachers that knew us back to front and we would remember them for life. At university it is just not the same. I was so glad I had Melissa there to talk to at that moment or else I really would have been in tears.

So now I have to sort out what 3 papers I can do instead. Sigh. Luckily this is almost my final year of choosing papers… next year for honors I can only do 4 papers and the choice range is small… hopefully I will get into honors. And then at teachers college you get all your papers on a plate!! Yeehhaa!!! No more choosing subjects!!... Still have to find two referees for my teachers college enrollment... have a couple of ideas...

All I need is just a little patience… and everything will be ok…

(I really hate grumbling like this, but it always helps if I can get everything out, and then I don’t feel so depressed.)

...and so the holidays continue

Well, a month now till I'm back at university as a third year student!!!!! Wow I'm already in my third year!!! Two years of university completed, three more to go, including teachers college. At the end of this year I'll be graduating with my BSc and then doing a year of honors and then a year of teachers college. I can't wait!! (not looking forwards to 8:30am lectures up in Karori though! Will have to get up really early...) And then I'll be out in the world contributing to the society, passing on the light of knowledge! Yeaaa!!! Everything I want in life starts with the same phrase: "When I graduate..." Can be a bit frustrating sometimes... But I'll get there.

Spent Thursday at Christina's house, mucking around and going swimming at Petone beach. Going to try and meet up with her lots before she goes back to Palmerston North...

Still waiting for my offer of study to arrive. But I guess everyone ends up enrolling at the last minute so it takes longer for offers of study to be sent out...at least that's according to my experience last year when I also enrolled in the very last few days before the enrollment was due and it took forever for my offer of study to come. I was really worried then because I thought they had lost my appplication or something... but it all worked out fine in the end so I'm sure it will all work out this year too. Really hope I get to do all the courses I want!!! :)

Have been feeling slightly schoolsick lately. But that's like that, I always feel school sick at the end of the year (after going to prizegiving) and then a bit at the beginning too because I witness Linda getting ready for school with her books and uniform and stuff and I'm like "I wanna go to school too!!" Had a phone call from Liz today, had a really nice chat! ...But made me think about school again because we ended up talking about our school memories and teachers and stuff... wah wah!

Started thinking about my birthday too which is coming up next month. I really hope more of my close friends can make it this year because last year not many could and it just wasn't the same without them. Talked to Melissa too who is back from Malaysia. She decided to take yr13 biology after all!! (but not chemistry, unfortunately) I just had to warn her about the slaters though...ohhh the memories make me shiver!!! Will meet up with her on Tuesday because she doesn't go back to school until next Friday. Looking forwards to it!!! :)

On to something random, finally after two years I got myself a lab coat (from trademe) for university. I wanted a blue lab coat but they are rare, so I ended up getting a white one... going to make it more interesting by finding a really exciting sew on picture and sew it on. I've been planning on getting a lab coat for ages (I wore this weird plastic one last year) but I kept forgetting and never got round to it until now...

Got a DVD game from video EZY 'Who wants to be a millionare' and have been playing that... good practice really, for general knowledge. Linda goes back to school next week and Mum goes back to work... so it will be just me left that's on holiday... Will enjoy my weeks of free time before I go back to university!!! :)