Holding your breath...

Yesterday I went to Sonia's house, and after going to Queensgate for a bit (I had to buy some things) we spent the afternoon together at her house, catching up. I also checked my results. Ok, another thing about being a 3rd year student; you're not as terrified to check your results. Well ok I was still terrified, but I felt a lot braver than the previous years. Only my biology lab paper result had come out so far. That was my greatest fear. To my most relief I passed my bio lab paper! Seriously, after that horrible HORRIBLE end of term theory test all my hopes of glory (A-, A, A+)had completely gone out the window. Grrr. Ok so I wish I got a better mark than a B-. Sigh. :( But seriously after the test I felt so horrible I wanted to cry, because I was so depressed I thought I was going to fail the whole course. :( It would be horrible having to repeat it. :(:( :( But luckily that didn't happen. Sigh. On a happy note, at least now that I've passed that lab paper I will never have to do PCR (evil evil EVIL) ever again!!!
...I pray that I can still be good enough to get into honours programe at the end of this year and do lots of post graduate genetics study...

Polina's Karyotype

2n = 46 chromosomes, 21 pairs

I decided to construct my own karyotype from the photograph of my chromosomes that we took in the lab. So this is my karyotype! (come on, isn't this exciting? how many people actually get to construct their own karyotype?! We learnt how to karyotype last year in the 200-level lab course) :):):)

Update on life during study...

A slight break from study on June 15th... (Ok I know you need slight breaks from study but I still felt so guilty! Sigh.) On June 15th was Linda's 14th birthday. It was also the day of her party. The night before her birthday Linda and Mila had a sleepover (while I was in my room studying genetics). Then before the party they decided to give me a makeover! Was I scared? Yes!They straightened my hair... did makeup...and even plucked my eyebrows! (first time ever in my life!) How I ever agreed to all this I have no idea. By this time Genetics study must have really got to my head!...I so did not look like myself!Then Linda's friends came and we had an English style tea party... everyone came dressed up...Linda opening her presents!I never knew baloon animal making could be so entertaining! Overall it was fun. But then afterwards I had to get back and concentrate on my studies in my room. It felt strange studying in my room now that I was used to studying at uni in the library. For one thing my desk felt so not big enough to spread out all my study materials! And I kept getting distracted. There was so much to do! Although I had 2 weeks to study solid genetics, it still felt not long enough! But the next day was Monday so I would be going back to university library to do solid genetics study 9am-7pm...

End of exams; Emptiness after chaos

I'm back!! Now exams are over. I should be happy. I really should be happy. But I'm not.

...Life feels so empty right now...

I haven't been blogging for over two weeks. I've been practically living at university since the end of my media exam. Studying for what? My genetics exam, which concluded yesterday at 4:20pm. Go in at 9am and home at 8pm. Every day for the past two weeks (excluding Saturday and Sunday! could have done that also...). I can't remember the last time I studied for something so much. Usually I like to study at home. But this time I don't know what has gotten into me. Maybe it's just a thing that comes with being a 3rd year student. I have developed a true passion for university. Ok so I've said this before. But now its different. I have found my area of study, one that makes me go "wow" (genetics) and I want to study it lots!!! The sad thing is that now that my genetics exam is over I have to wait till NEXT year to do any more genetics study. Sigh. How will I ever survive next trimester? There are no more undergraduate genetics papers!!! Wahhhh!!!! After these past weeks it feels so strange not studying.... sigh. Feel empty right now.
Ok enough of my complaints. Exams are over. I should be happy.

Now for an update on my past 2 weeks of genetics study marathon;
I usually like to study alone. I don't know why. It's just a thing I do. For most of the first week I spent studying in my new favourite study spot in the university library on the first floor. There is this series of mythical paintings on the wall and below them is a table. During this study period this became my favourite study spot. As I said I usually like to study alone... so I did...until Christina found me! So then we studied together and it was actually ok. But then there was this door and our table was right next to the door and it kept making creaky noises so eventually we ended up moving to the 8th floor... which had the most amazing view of Wellington! (But the table below the painting still remains as my favourite spot!). Anyway, we ended up studying together every day at uni from 9am-7pm! Now that exams are over I'm going to really miss that.

Another great thing about studying at uni is that you can ask questions! I have officially got back my habit of asking questions (shyness slowly rotting away!)! ...I always thought lecturers are the easiest people in the world to find since they seem to live in their offices. Ummm not quite as true as it seems! I spent most of last week trying to find Dr GR to ask some cytogenetics questions… and he had vanished! Seriously! Then I e-mailed him and still no answer. Ok so I waited until Tuesday when we were supposed to have a genetics tutorial. I thought 'great ok I can ask my cytogenetics questions!' But he wasn't there! Ok so then I gave up hope completely. By then I was pretty convinced he had left the planet! Then after the tutorial (molecular genetics Dr GC stayed for the whole tutorial) while waiting for my lunch to heat up I decided to randomly check my e-mail (I have to note that this is yet another thing that comes with being a 3rd year student; you actually start to check your student e-mail, which is something I have never done before, and as a result have accumulated 109 unread e-mails). And he replied! :) So then I went and asked all my questions! :)

Well I won’t go into all the details of every day of the past two weeks, since they all pretty much involved the same routine; into uni to study genetics at 9am. Back home at 8pm. Sleep. Apart from genetics, I learned two very obvious random things during this study period (which I just never paid attention to before); a) there are two staircases in the library to go up/down levels (I always thought there was one) and b) you can open doors at university after hours, or late at night using your student ID card! (I thought it was a special card or something! But no it’s just an id card!). Days flew by like autumn leaves in the breeze...

Then Friday the 20^th June came…
On Friday I had a horrible day. The day before the genetics exam. I was so nervous! By this time I had already finished going through all the past exam papers, which was actually rather entertaining. The week before, on Monday after my media exam I went to the library to photocopy all the past exam papers, that come in big booklets, the earliest being 1998. Ok I though. That will be great! 9 years of exams to revise from. So then I started looking for genetics in the booklets…1998…1999….2000…2001…and couldn’t find the papers! By then I was getting worried! What happened to genetics?! But finally at 2002…victory! I was very relieved, and copied all the exams from 2002-2007! (I later found out that this course didn’t exist until 2002! How terrible! Luckily I wasn’t at uni then!).

Anyway, by Friday I was getting really nervous. And with nervousness comes grumpiness. I really really really wanted to do very well in this exam. I cared so much about genetics… At first two weeks of study seemed like a long time. I had done every single past exam paper. But as the day of the exam drew nearer I started to have some doubt. Friday was a horrible day. I wished this genetics paper didn't have an exam, like my previous genetics paper. Sigh. The littlest things made me upset. I felt like I hadn’t done enough study. I wished we had another 2 weeks to study. I wanted to be alone. I didn’t want my friends to see me so frazzled … After lunch I ran away from my friends and went to my favourite study spot. Christina texted me but I didn’t reply. I wanted to be alone. Sigh. I buried myself in my study, writing essay after essay. Down syndrome, sex determination, human aneuploids… Until one of my friends found me. We talked. Then he left. Then Christina came. He must have told her where I was. She gave me a reassuring pep talk about exams, and tried to cheer me up. I ended up going back to study with her, feeling somewhat happier. Sigh.

On Saturday 21^st June I sat the exam. Then it was over. Just like that. Sigh. Now all I can do is wait. And pray.

...A random thought occurred to me while studying genetics; If I ever discover a new chromosomal abnormality I'm going to name it 'Jilinapoli Syndrome' (computer username)! I know it’s a really random thought. Strange things start running though your mind when you study…

On a random note, I decided I just have to have the book 'iGenetics' by Russell. Over the study period I had used that book so much and realized how great it is, but I'll have to give Christina's copy of it back now that exams are over. But I just have to get a copy of my own!!! It's so great!!! Almost as great as 'Genetics' by Strickberger! That’s just a thing about me and books. If I like a book very much I just have to have it. So far I found one on Amazon... :) I'm crazy, I know.

Now my exams are over. I’m back online (as you can see) and back to reading, TV, socializing etc. But after my study marathon, it feels so strange not having to study anymore. I don't really know what to do with myself! And I miss uni already! Speaking of which, my next order of business will be to decide on my subjects for next semester. So far I only know that I'm taking evolution and that's all. I decided I'm going to change my english paper to a media paper. I don't want to take English anymore. I decided that I want to stay at uni for a very very very long time! (Like, forever!!!) and do something incredibly fascinating with genetics and chromosomes. My long term ambition (as of this year) is to get a PhD in genetics (after Honours, Masters etc). Media was random and enjoyable this semester so I'll do it again as a random interest paper. I still haven't decided on my second biology paper. So that will give me something to ponder about...

…I’m really going to miss genetics next semester… :( (sad face x1million) WARNING: you are going to be hearing this a lot from me!

Study Leave

Well just a short run down on this week before I get back to my genetics study (!!!) (I usually use the book 'Genetics' by Strickberger(it's the best!) but I decided to borrow this book off my friend because it has more molecular stuff...)

As I said I spent the whole weekend working on my translocation heterozygote assignment. It was very interesting! On Monday I finished it…or so I thought…on Tuesday about 2 hours before I was about to go in to university to hand it in, I decided to have one final look at what I’ve written…well that was a mistake. The more I re-read it the more I felt I had to add important stuff in… so then I ended up writing more and more… It was already 3pm…I had to catch the train…I nearly missed it! But I got in to university on time and handed the assignment in at exactly 5pm just as it was due! (After I spent about 15 minutes standing by the hand-in box re-reading it over and over again)

The rest of the week I spent studying for my media exam which was on Friday. We had to prepare 4 essays and learn a bunch of definitions… The essay topics were ok, but there was this one topic which I was so unsure about. In the exam we had to write definitions and then write 2 essays; one that the lecturer chose and the other what we chose… Anyway, eventually Friday came and I went to do the exam. On the way I picked up my media essay on ’To Kill a mockingbird’ and got an A-! Then I sat the exam… well just my luck; the essay question I wasn’t sure about was the compulsory one! I really hope it went ok! …But the definitions were fine and I ended up writing my chosen essay on Marshall McLuhans Laws of the media.

After the exam I felt relieved that it was over and really happy because now I could study genetics non-stop!!!! For the next 2 weeks!!!! Which is what I’ve been doing all weekend… :) ...Going in to university tomorrow to photocopy all the past exam papers... since 1997! Then I'll do them all... :) (today I finished writing all my cue cards!) Oh genetics is so fun to study!!! :):):)

Oh and I forgot to say that two weeks ago I went to the 'Cats' musical and it was wonderful! I wanted to go again and again! :) Very enjoyable!

This is the song that never ends...

Cytogenetics assignment title page!

I can’t believe this trimester is almost over! I’m feeling a bit sad right now…

The week was quite stressful since I had a lab test coming up on Thursday. From previous experience I knew the lab test would be ummm how I put it nicely…??... so I spent all weekend and the previous week studying for it. On Monday I had good old genetics. I really don’t know how I’ll survive without it next semester! I’ll miss it sooo much! I was relieved to know that the due date for our cytogenetics assignment (which was NOT an essay! I was wrong! ...maybe that’s a good thing, I was getting a bit tired of essays) was put back till next Tuesday. What a relief. I had started it, but wasn’t sure how much of it I’ll get done before Friday (which is when it was first due) since I had that lab test to study for. I was feeling pedantic about it. I really wanted to do well in it.

After the lecture I decided to stay at university and study for the lab test. That day I re-discovered the fact that asking questions is a good thing. I was studying the cytogenetics section of the lab and then I decided to go and ask my lecturer some questions. I was actually really surprised with myself. I hadn’t really been asking questions since college… I don’t know, I guess at university I felt shy… But that day I was feeling adventurous. So I wrote down my list of questions and went to see Dr Rickards about the cytogenetics lab. It was great! I had almost forgotten what asking questions felt like! …I understood everything! On the way back I went past the biology office to pick up my remaining lab reports. I was also hoping our essays on immunogenetics would be marked…but no luck. No lab reports or essays. I felt a bit panicky then. Our lab test was only 3 days away!!! I went back to the library and studied till 5pm and then went home…and studied more for the lab test. Then I decided that 24hours in the day is just not long enough!

On Tuesday I went to university really early. Don’t really know why I did that, I just felt like it I guess. I went and asked my other lecturers some questions (but only the nice ones!). It had been an extremely productive day in terms of study, except for that media studies lecture where we really didn’t do much at all. We got our essay questions for the exam. But I barely looked at them. I had to study for that lab test! Once again I went past the biology office that day… and this time I was lucky. All our marked lab reports were there…and they were not depressing at all! As I was about to leave my molecular genetics lecturer Dr Chambers arrived with our essays! He gave me mine…A+!!! Yippeee!! I had been pretty nervous about it; it was way over the word limit! Feeling incredibly positive and inspired I went back to the library and continued pouring over my lab manual. Oh and I also went to the biology lab and got a photograph taken of my chromosomes with a special microscope camera!! Yippeeee!!! We will have them e-mailed to us! I can’t wait! That day I got home at 7pm. And continued studying…

On Wednesday once again I went to university really early and stayed there studying for the whole day! It was so great! Once again I got heaps of study done! The highlight of the day was of course the genetics lecture. I liked the Wednesday lectures, they were two hours long. One hour lectures seem so short when you’re learning about something really exciting! I don’t need to say what I did for the rest of that day. Once again I stayed at university and studied for the lab test…and got home at 7pm.

The next morning I got up feeling really nervous. It was the day of the lab test. Although the test was at lunchtime, I still went in to university at 10am…still clutching my lab manual. I hadn’t parted with it for the past how many days?? Then it was time for the test. Collecting my lab reports and parting with my lab manual (which we weren’t allowed to take in) I went in and did it…and did it…and did it…It was the longest test ever!! It felt like the never-ending story!! Page after page after page…I was seeing stars…and more stars…and more stars… My first intention when I sat the test was to flick straight to the chromosome section and do that first. That was the section I was least worried about… but I restrained myself from doing so, until I was about half way through the test and felt like screeching. Then I went and did the chromosome section…they were mostly questions I had asked a couple of days ago! What a relief! By the time I came out of the test I was feeling….aghhhhh!!!!!!!!!! I had studied so much for it…but I felt terrible afterwards. So upset!!! …but I still had to get my cytogenetics assignment done, which I sat in the computer room till 6:30pm doing. I tried to forget about the test but it wasn’t easy. Sigh. Please let it all be ok.

On Friday we had our last genetics lecture. I felt so sad. I didn’t want it to end. I wanted it to last forever…but it didn’t. Sigh. Now I have to wait till next year. Nooooooo!!!! The great thing about Friday was that when I got home at 7pm I got recieved an e-mail with my chromosome photo!!! Yippee!!! Of course the first thing I did was printed it out and stuck it on my wall!! Did several versions too, in Adobe photoshop trying to get as clear an image as possible! (see previous post for photo!) Come on admit it, it's exciting!!! How many people get to see their own chromosomes in real life?!!

I spent the weekend pouring over my cytogenetics assignment on human translocation heterozygotes. It’s so fascinating! Heheheheh… The only downside was that on Saturday my computer went wacko and I didn't save my work...so I lost half of my assignment! It was grrr!!! But hey, I did it all over ok and now I'm almost done! :) Really need to finish it soon so I can start studying for my media exam which is next Friday!... Oh and I decided that studying at Uni is more exciting than staying at home so I'm going to be going in to uni to study during this study break...